When u replace Harry Potter’s god father with an orange: orange is the new black
okay today i learned that apparently the penis has a say in whether or not a child will be a boy or a girl
female sperm swims slower than male sperm, but the males can’t swim for as long as the females. this means that a long penis will be closer to the egg when releasing the sperm, and there will be a higher chance for the child to be a boy.
so in conclusion
if you have a lot of sons you have a big dick
THIS IS MY NEW FAVORITE POST
Anonymous asked: My boyfriend & I usually have sex on the floor behind his bed so when you walk in you can only see the bed. And we were having sex one day & I was on top and his mom walks in and she can't see him but she can see me with my shirt on, and she's asking me where he is and I'm sitting on his dick & he's on the bottom trying not to laugh and moving around to make me make faces. And we were talking for like 15 minutes while I was sitting on his dick and having pleasant talk with his mom. NEVER AGAIN.
how to properly write fanfiction
- write 1 chapter
- don’t write for a week
- start an entirely new story
- rinse, lather, repeat
“GIVE IT SEVEN YEARS AND HE’LL BE GIVING YOU JUST THAT.”
I tried to scroll past this. I really did.
Shoutout to the girls gettin chub rub but walking like your life isn’t falling apart because your inner thighs are on fire
i think you could fall inlove with anyone if you got to see parts of them no one else gets to see. like if you followed them around for a day and saw them crying in their bed or singing to themselves as they made a sandwich. i think after seeing them at their most vulnerable you wouldnt be able to help falling inlove with them
honestly my favorite thing ive ever made in photoshop is catloaf
my graphic arts teacher hung it on the wall in the ga computer lab
this is it. this the post that made me watch this damn musical